Conversation -- on Regret

SCENE:
ME is washing dishes.

Me: (absent-mindedly) I wonder whether I have enough - yes, there's half a bottle left. What a pretty shade of blue. and a half meters, Yes.

Enter LEFT VENTRICLE, stage right.

Left Ventricle: I wanted to be the Queen of the May when I was in high school.

Me: Will the fabric fit in the- yes, extra. Someday I should probably take a noxious chemical to the outside of this.

Left Ventricle: (slightly louder) I wanted to be the Queen of the May when I was in high school.

Me: (still absent-mindedly) What's that, dear? No, don't - wh- good. Why is this? Oh.

Left Ventricle: (slightly louder) I wanted to be the Queen of the May when I was in high school.

Me: Did you ever tell me that?

Left Ventricle: Yes. We were looking at Grandma's photo album, and there was a picture of her with her triangular 1940's hairstyle and a coat draped over her shoulders and a crown on her head, and she said, "I was the Queen of the May," and I said, "I want to be the Queen of the May too."

Me: Oh. So why didn't you become the Queen of the May?

Left Ventricle: You didn't let me.

Me: What do you mean? There probably hasn't been a Queen of the May since Grandma was in high school.

Left Ventricle: There was.

Me: What did we do? Remind me.

Left Ventricle: (no answer - pouting)

Me: (slowly recalling) Well, let's see. You know that's probably mythology, but anyway, it wasn't that we couldn't be bothered. No, you don't remember that we specifically didn't want to? Don't you remember what we did in those days? We read great works. We met interesting people. We actually did engage in a couple of save-the-world projects that had an effect -- you don't remember those meetings? It was amazing. We walked on banisters. We rowed. We used to walk down the middle of the street from sheer bliss and notice the geraniums. We read sitting in the rosebush. You don't remember any of this?

Left Ventricle: I do, now that you mention it.

Me: We did a lot of good things. You didn't lose out from not being Queen of the May. In fact, it's much better that you weren't. Do you agree?

Left Ventricle. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I do agree. You're right. It was good. It was better that way.

(satisfied pause.)

I wanted to be the Queen of the May in high school.

Me: Will you kindly go back to pumping blood like you're supposed to?

Left Ventricle: Oh! Right.
Exeunt.